Last night, I went to my friend Amy’s play, Paradise Hotel, at the Bedlam Theater. It was funny and all about sex. Amy read about the audition for the play 30 minutes before it was to occur and decided to go. There, she was asked to seduce a chair. And she did. And she got the part! Now I’m worried that when Amy and I are in class together, my chair is going to drop me on the ground so it can go nuzzle up against her butt.

I left my house extremely early to go to the play – Patrick and tried to see it last weekend, but were late and couldn’t get in, and I was paranoid about missing it again. It was good that I left early because, a few blocks from my house, I saw an elderly woman stumbling along the sidewalk. I stopped the car and rushed over to her. Her name was Verna; she had a broken sandal; and she reeked of alcohol. She asked me to help her to her apartment, so I supported her as we walked the five blocks, stopping repeatedly to put the sandal back on her foot. We talked as we walked, and I learned that she had a 70 year old son. (Verna is old!) We also talked about gardens and traffic patterns. We got to the apartment building, and she told me that it wasn’t actually her apartment, but a friend of hers, and she thought that maybe he friend was taking a nap. At that point, a woman who lived in the apartment came out to see what was going on. She went to find Verna’s friend while Verna and I waited. I could hear the doorbell ring several times before the friend came to the door. This man, probably in his early 40’s, swaggered to the foyer, where he put his hands in the air and stated that he was too inebriated to help Verna into his apartment. So the other woman and I helped Verna up the stairs into the small, dirty apartment. I was glad the other woman was there because Verna’s friend kept touching both of us – patting us on the backs and putting his hand around our waists. Verna thanked me, and I told her to drink some water. And then I left.

I can’t stop thinking about a moment while Verna and I were walking down the sidewalk, clutching to each other, when she stopped, looked me in the eyes, and said, “You know, getting old is SO hard.” I hope it wasn’t bad that I left her in that apartment.